Courageous

Joshua 9:1 Tells us to be strong and to be COURAGEOUS in the Lord.  (my paraphrase)

 

recently, I was thinking of a time when I was struggling with fear and doubt.  Afraid to do with what God was calling me to do, which was stay the course.  I was thinking about our financial goals and wondered how are we going to make these goals if I continue in my part-time job?  If I continue teaching our slightly autistic son how to be independent.  (something he fights against) I mean we need around 15-20 thousand dollars by spring to make much-needed repairs on the house.  Oh and my printer has died, and my laptop needs a new battery, but its days even with a new battery, are maybe another year.  The other thing that I want to do is to send some written work to publishers and become published.  Aren’t those two necessary, so why are they breaking?  We are trying to save money not spend more!  The more I thought about it, the more fear gripped my heart.  The interesting thing is that while I was busy in fear, my husband has started to act boldly.  That is just it, God uses the evil ones plans against him.  He knows the hearts of men and women.  He knows that I will be gripped with fear, but he also knows that I have been praying for my husband to be courageous and bold as the leader of the household. Through the fear, I stepped down completely and allowed my husband to take charge.  Actually he had to take charge because things were falling apart, we were not saving money.  I was unable to shop thrifty.  (according to my kids, Lincoln jumps off of the penny  and says let go all right already)  but I found myself crying to my husband that everything was a mess and that I was having trouble functioning.  See he generally leaves the household stuff up to me.  But this time, he stepped up and said well we need to do this, this, and that.  Somehow, I knew that God was behind this change and that my husband, was being courageous and bold.  As I took this step the fear started to dissolve (the evil one lost his grip). Sometimes we just have to trust that God is working through our husbands and allow them to lead.  Allow them to be the men God made them be.  Then we will find the peace like a river, the strength of a MOM WITH A NEW BABY, and the courage of a warrior.

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